Bag vs. Bag (a.k.a. Suits vs. Sweats)

So its been a month now, since I've become a "regular" on the TTC and though I admittedly only "ride the rocket" 3 days a week, its enough for me to get a handle on the daily goings-on vis-a-vis travel in Toronto (aliteration kids, its the way of the future!!).

I suppose firstly, we ought to gauge the Proper Platform Positioning (see 3P - oh! -sorry couldn't resist that one). I've come to figure out where it is exactly that I wish to be standing on the platform at the respective stations I travel to and from. I know that by standing at this particular end of Platform X, I'll be in prime position to transfer onto the train at Platform Y and so on. This method applies to the entrance/exit strategies for subway riders as well. Here's the thing, as a relative novice to daily commuting, I've noticed that not everyone seems to have this idea down pat. Sure, there are those who get it, but then there's the delinquently late mofo's who figure they can scurry past (often with heavy shoulder-useage) you whilst you wait in prime 3P stance - and as soon as the doors chirp open with that "ding-dang-dong"ednes that echoes of TTC, they're past you faster than a fat kid pouncing on a smartie!

Before we get onto riding the actual train, I must bring up this related observation - I notice that every morning, without fail, people rush in from the streets, desperate to squeeze through the closing doors - why? Can't you see that this box-car is filled to the brim? While I can understand the need to "make it on time", you're not leaving Zoo Station are ya?! I mean yeah, if you're anywhere along the line other than the start or finish points, I comprehend the desire to jump through such hurdles (and its always the businessmen or women for some reason who do this most), when you're standing at the station, your face pressed up against the glass, why not just simply turn around (I'm talking at Finch or Downsview etc) and just get on the freshly emptied train behind you? Ya, you'll be another 2 minutes, but hey, you've got a seat, and half your outfit isn't caught on the platform of the station??

Ok, so, now we're in the train - great! Only, now you can't find a seat b/c every arse in there has taken up more room on the chair - its as if you were in their own private bathrooms - legs stretched out like so - paper in one hand, coffee in the other, blackberry between the two, iPod (or similar MP3 device) dangling from the ears - and then...right there...the bag!

Here's where I noticed the fun part - the looks one gets with "the bag". There are many a bag to be found on the TTC, without a doubt, many a big, bulky, bag. For starters there's the school bag (and all of its modified forms - a group to which I recently realigned myself with); then (by the way this is in no particular order) there's the woman's (and more recently man's...) purse. These come in a variety of shapes/sizes/insignias/designer decals/strap length/colour etc. And lest we forget my favourite - the briefcase or satchel. I have especially come to adore (read loathe) the ones that are attached to the trolley carts! What I find particularly interesting here, is that regardless of your bag, you're always going to get the "look" - y'know, the one that says "oh shit, please don't stand/sit/breathe next to me with that thing, oh crap....its coming over...damn, damn..." and suddenly you blurt out "sure, you can sit next to me, no problem!" - but...know what I noticed?? YOU'RE MOVING YOUR BAG OFF THE EMPTY CHAIR TO MAKE ROOM FOR THEIR BUTT - AND BAG!!

Now, I'm guilty of this phenomena too - especially in the afternoon train rides -but I can get away with it b/c its 1230, 1pm - not exactly the peak of rush hour - but try pulling that shit at 715am - you'll get your ass handed to you by Ronald in Accounting...that fucker's been working out it seems!

What kills me the most though, is the snears and snide remarks I hear on the train in the morning between the bagged class. The women, well, sorry ladies, but y'all just look at everyone wondering what the hell they're up to or what they're looking at when staring at you. The students laughing at the jagoff with the briefcase doing the crossword puzzle lookin' all "dorky" and "punk ass" as I heard it put this morning, and then there's the "I'm too good to be riding this train with you, you little high school shit" look that some corporate CEO wannabe ('cause we know that the CEO wouldn't be caught dead on a train, let alone at rush hour, when he/she can sleep in til 930 and run their lil' Porsche Boxter in at 1045 down the DVP - that is if they don't get sidetracked on the way to the Gym/Golf Course/Insert nouveau-chic activity/hobby here...) drills into the back and/or front of your skull while they rock back n' forth to the rolling/screetching/bone-rattling vibrations of the morning commute!!

All this and its only been the first month - but not to worry, I've got more...next time I'll chat about the "Drive to Survive" - parking your vehicle at the subway lot - ooh the goodies I've got with that one...in the meantime, I've got a train to catch!

Done

Peace

EM