This is not a test... oh, and some shoutouts!

Ladies n' Gentlemen of CyberSpace - I want to take a moment of your time, or rather my time, whatever, and wish you all a very chappy chanukah, merry christmas, happy kwanza, and I'm sure I'm leaving out a celebration or two - so happy happy to you too.

OISE Part I - done! Now, I shall take the time to linger around the house aimlessly, pack a bag and head on down to Florida, soak up the sun for a few days, and hustle back into the Hill, for a raucous New Year's Eve Bash (my place people, my place!!) and then a lil' shushhing down the hills of Appalachia in La Belle Province - Montreal, QC.

Best part of this whole wacky adventure - NO HOMEWORK!!!!

Consider yourselves invited to the celebrations at Chateau Miron on December 31, 2006-January 1, 2007 - Gd willing, I'll have a bit of a tan to sport that evening....

And now for something completely different...Birthday Shoutouts!!

Celebrating in December are the following people that come to mind at 1230am...

My Dad!!
Shoshana Allen!!
Marla Lipman (today, actually)!!
Jesus H. Christ!! (but, I hear there's some dispute as to the actual date - some say April...can we get a ruling??)
Dr. Jaime DeBora (now taking new patients at his clinic)!!

That's all I got for now - my sincerest apologies if I missed you...whaddya want at 1230am???

PEACE!

Done.

EM

Whistle While You Work...

School's gettin' rough...workloads are piling up and so some things get neglected - in some cases, sadly its people, in other times its my own well being - must...work...harder...at staying...focused.

Positive news on the horizon - only 12 more days til' school's out for the Holidays!!! Yaaaabaaadaabbaaaadoooooooooooooo!!!

Y'know lookin' at this, this post isn't much...but again, neglect...its a bitch!!

Higher Learning

So a funny thing happened to me on the way home from...

I did my cousin a "solid" and gave him a lift to York. As I'm leaving I hear this weird rattling noise from the rear of my car - I pull over by Calumet College (for those of you who know the campus) and proceed to check for anything suspect.

As I'm hopelessly looking at the underbelly of the car, in the rain no less, some random "dude" comes up to me and with this helpless look on his face says to me "dude, do you smoke weed??"

Now, my personal opinions on illegal substances asides, that had to be the most random, surreal thing I've heard uttered at York in a while.

I answered back "nah dude sorry, I don't...." he gave this little whimper-like stare and then looked at me as if I just told him that Santa Claus wasn't real...then he twisted on his heels a la Charlie Chaplin, and just picked up his pace and left. Then as he walked away in the rain, and I was back in the car, I instinctively looked down to his hand - and there was one of the fattest "cigarettes" I've ever seen!!


Weird.

Only in America

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AGU-imc6pyA&NR

Just watch. Trust me.

Done.

EM

Oh My Goodness, Such a Thriller...

Please click on the link. Watch the clip. Proceed to piss yourself silly...

Bollywood's going too far....

Done.

EM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xk9YtgyMz4

Optical Confusion!

I know I've been AWOL lately - teacher's college is a truly busy place, so it's not easy to just up n' blog when I want...plus, its been a turbulent month so forgive me for not writing, its been 2 weeks and a day since my last blog...errr, skip that last part.

Anyhow, a true miracle of miracles happened tod..yesterday. Anyone who knows me well knows I'm a glasses-wearer, in fact I have been since age 8 or 9 - started young!

Anyhow, I swore I would never, ever wear contact lenses, as I have a severe phobia/paranoia about the touching of eyes - especially my own. In any event, I went shopping for a new pair of prescription sunglasses - as mine have broken - and lo and behold, the optometrist suggests going for contacts - and lemme just say this guy's a smooth talker - either that or the fact that I hadn't eaten all day was a huge contributer - 'cause the next thing I know I'm in his office chair, head tilted back and he's inserting "tester" contacts.

So there I am - less blind than normal - and I feel these annoying lil' water-based-gel-infused lenses rubbing the shite outta my nerve endings - something I'll told will last for 4 hours and then never happen again, not because they get used to it - but b/c it "dulls" the nerve endings! Oh joy!

Then, as I'm checkin' myself out sans glasses, I realize and think to myself "Shit!! How am I gonna get these out??"

So I guess I psyched myself out, b/c it took no word of a lie - 30 mins for him to remove them - b/c I kept shutting my eyes out of that very fear/discomfort aforementioned.

And to think, I'm debating the plusses of laser-eye surgery - to rid myself of the damned glasses issue once and for all - but the procedure itself involves consicousness, machines which hold open your eyelids oh and that pesky laser-beam cutting your retinas down to microscopic success?!

Oh, and on the bright side - I won Leaf tix!! woohoo!

More bloggin' as I get to it...patience is a virtue or something like that...

Done.

Peace.

Back.

EM

Another day at the office...

I've just recently had a confrontation with one of them and I'm kicking myself.Student X is extremely apathetic and has zero desire to be in the class. His attendance is no better than the Maple Leafs power play these days - erratic at best.X missed an assigned project I gave to the rest of the class. When he did show up, I adapted the assignment to meet his needs (he's LD or identified - he's getting 6% overall in the course - and no, that's not a typo).We went over the newly adapted assignment together, I made my expectations clear and concise. The due date came and went (like our practicum huh?), and lo and behold no assignment.X arrived in class yesterday - I asked him if he had the assignment to which he replied he did not. I told him I would like to speak to him after class. Begrudgingly he complied. When the final bell rung, he attempted to leave the room without staying, I told him to take a seat, that we needed to talk but he refused, so I blocked the door and told him to sit down - so he sat on one of the desks, staring at the floor.I began to ask why he failed to do the assignment - to which he replied - "I dunno, I don't care what the @#$%@#$%@#$% do you care?" - the conversation went on like that for a minute. I allowed him to speak his mind, then I began to remind him that his language is inappropriate when addressing me. I asked him a few times to look me in the eye (which he refused). Then he began yelling at me. I told him "look, I like you, you can stay in the class, but your attitude is not welcome in the classroom). When it comes to 5th period, check your attitude at the door..."He yelled some more - and then...out of nowhere, in attempting to rush past me out the door (and my AT was watching all this for the most part) - I snapped and yelled at him to sit down and not to move until I tell him to.I felt like utter crap. He pushed my buttons and I reacted. Granted we're all new at this, but I'm so disappointed that I yelled in the end. I feel like anything I may have said up until that point is now useless and hopelessly ignored.

The Prestige

Abra Cadabra...INDEED!

So ya wanna get sanctimonious eh !#@$!@#$ ???

That's right kids, I used a big word...and there's plenty more where that came from!

It seems as though some people in this world are only getting dumber (witness the latest generation of youth for starters), and yet with this new-found idiocy there's still this sense of "I'm smarter than you because..." attitude. Amazing how kids these days think they're so smart and so witty (OMG, I'm sounding like an old man!!!!!!!!!), but I got news for 'em...YOU'RE NOT!

Two days into my teaching placement and its quite the adjustment - so far the staff's been extremely welcoming and the kids that I've met and observed have been genuinely great (its just some of the others wandering about I'm talkin' 'bout) - weird being back at my old school -some things have changed, others certainly have not. More on this in the weeks to come - b/c its certainly going to take up an extreme amount of my time - good-bye social life!

P.S. To the annonymous scribe who commented on my last post - I say to thee - HARDY-HAR-HAR... however, I also caution you to think twice, nay, three times before taking U2's name/site/trademark logos/philosophy/songs/members/fans/really anything to do with them, in vain again!

Consider yourself warned!

Done.
Peace.

EM

Fear Not Fearless Readers

Hey all,

Haven't forgotten the blog...just been insanely smothered with school work and life's stresses in general.

Yet fear not, for I shall overcome - and soon you will have all the bloggin' you can (or can't) handle.

Tigers in the series...WOW... c'mon Mets, so my prediction can come through...and then...I call.... TIGERS to win the World Series in 6 Games.

Peace.
Done.

EM

Bag vs. Bag (a.k.a. Suits vs. Sweats)

So its been a month now, since I've become a "regular" on the TTC and though I admittedly only "ride the rocket" 3 days a week, its enough for me to get a handle on the daily goings-on vis-a-vis travel in Toronto (aliteration kids, its the way of the future!!).

I suppose firstly, we ought to gauge the Proper Platform Positioning (see 3P - oh! -sorry couldn't resist that one). I've come to figure out where it is exactly that I wish to be standing on the platform at the respective stations I travel to and from. I know that by standing at this particular end of Platform X, I'll be in prime position to transfer onto the train at Platform Y and so on. This method applies to the entrance/exit strategies for subway riders as well. Here's the thing, as a relative novice to daily commuting, I've noticed that not everyone seems to have this idea down pat. Sure, there are those who get it, but then there's the delinquently late mofo's who figure they can scurry past (often with heavy shoulder-useage) you whilst you wait in prime 3P stance - and as soon as the doors chirp open with that "ding-dang-dong"ednes that echoes of TTC, they're past you faster than a fat kid pouncing on a smartie!

Before we get onto riding the actual train, I must bring up this related observation - I notice that every morning, without fail, people rush in from the streets, desperate to squeeze through the closing doors - why? Can't you see that this box-car is filled to the brim? While I can understand the need to "make it on time", you're not leaving Zoo Station are ya?! I mean yeah, if you're anywhere along the line other than the start or finish points, I comprehend the desire to jump through such hurdles (and its always the businessmen or women for some reason who do this most), when you're standing at the station, your face pressed up against the glass, why not just simply turn around (I'm talking at Finch or Downsview etc) and just get on the freshly emptied train behind you? Ya, you'll be another 2 minutes, but hey, you've got a seat, and half your outfit isn't caught on the platform of the station??

Ok, so, now we're in the train - great! Only, now you can't find a seat b/c every arse in there has taken up more room on the chair - its as if you were in their own private bathrooms - legs stretched out like so - paper in one hand, coffee in the other, blackberry between the two, iPod (or similar MP3 device) dangling from the ears - and then...right there...the bag!

Here's where I noticed the fun part - the looks one gets with "the bag". There are many a bag to be found on the TTC, without a doubt, many a big, bulky, bag. For starters there's the school bag (and all of its modified forms - a group to which I recently realigned myself with); then (by the way this is in no particular order) there's the woman's (and more recently man's...) purse. These come in a variety of shapes/sizes/insignias/designer decals/strap length/colour etc. And lest we forget my favourite - the briefcase or satchel. I have especially come to adore (read loathe) the ones that are attached to the trolley carts! What I find particularly interesting here, is that regardless of your bag, you're always going to get the "look" - y'know, the one that says "oh shit, please don't stand/sit/breathe next to me with that thing, oh crap....its coming over...damn, damn..." and suddenly you blurt out "sure, you can sit next to me, no problem!" - but...know what I noticed?? YOU'RE MOVING YOUR BAG OFF THE EMPTY CHAIR TO MAKE ROOM FOR THEIR BUTT - AND BAG!!

Now, I'm guilty of this phenomena too - especially in the afternoon train rides -but I can get away with it b/c its 1230, 1pm - not exactly the peak of rush hour - but try pulling that shit at 715am - you'll get your ass handed to you by Ronald in Accounting...that fucker's been working out it seems!

What kills me the most though, is the snears and snide remarks I hear on the train in the morning between the bagged class. The women, well, sorry ladies, but y'all just look at everyone wondering what the hell they're up to or what they're looking at when staring at you. The students laughing at the jagoff with the briefcase doing the crossword puzzle lookin' all "dorky" and "punk ass" as I heard it put this morning, and then there's the "I'm too good to be riding this train with you, you little high school shit" look that some corporate CEO wannabe ('cause we know that the CEO wouldn't be caught dead on a train, let alone at rush hour, when he/she can sleep in til 930 and run their lil' Porsche Boxter in at 1045 down the DVP - that is if they don't get sidetracked on the way to the Gym/Golf Course/Insert nouveau-chic activity/hobby here...) drills into the back and/or front of your skull while they rock back n' forth to the rolling/screetching/bone-rattling vibrations of the morning commute!!

All this and its only been the first month - but not to worry, I've got more...next time I'll chat about the "Drive to Survive" - parking your vehicle at the subway lot - ooh the goodies I've got with that one...in the meantime, I've got a train to catch!

Done

Peace

EM

Movies n' Football

I'm thinking more and more lately, that I want to make a movie. Some of my friends and I have always said that we should just document our lives, 'cause silly things are bound to happen and we should get them caught on tape. Sounds logical, I know. So...I think that's what I'm going to do. I've got the equipment - at least the main one being the camera - I know how to work it, so there's the cinematography, direction and ultimately production. Script, you ask? Hmmm, ok well I've got a few things tinkering around, and I know that there's a lot of material out there, not to mention the whole 'unscripted' aspect of documentary filmmaking (lookout TIFF!!).

OK, so...let's make a movie, huh kids? I'm taking suggestion/artistic input, so feel free to drop a comment or two as for theme suggestions etc.

Moving onwards, I think I'm becoming more fascinated with football, American football. I don't quite know all the 'ins and outs' of the game, nor can I really name you any major superstars in the game (but don't get me wrong, I know my T.O.'s, Brady's, Favre's etc), nor do I recall who won SuperBowl XIXVCMGUCCM etc. but I think I'm liking the game more and more. So much so, in fact that I'm thinking of getting a "team". That is to say that I'm going to jump on a bandwagon and ride it into the 4th and Goal!! (eh, not bad, eh?!)

So far, I'm favouring the NY Jets (you can thank the Joe Namath and the recent Mark Wahlberg "Invinceable" movie), that and b/c realistically I could drive down and catch a game - on that note, I'd say the Buffalo Bills but then again, its Buffalo. Coming from Toronto, I don't think I can pledge myself to any team from Buffalo - despite my empathy for Buffalo's losing ways/choking style, when it comes to the playoffs...so, I think it'll be the Jets.

Just realized, I'm going to have to really learn the rules of the game, and I'm going to have to commit myself to the schedule more often. I mean I can handle HNIC on Saturday Nights, that's just life, but Sundays and/or Mondays...tough call. Then there's the whole NFL cable package...oh well I'm not 100% committed to the idea yet.

Back to the filmmaking concept - I will be holding auditions in the weeks to come (once I figure out for sure that I'm doing this) - I'll need male and female leads/support, so all are welcome.

Done for now, I think.

PEACE.

EM

Go Jets?

Shofar Sho Good!

To all my friends, family, loved ones, liked ones, and to those of you who just pop in and read this on occassion - HAPPY NEW YEAR - ROSH HASHANA STYLE!!

May this Jewish New Year bring you and your loved ones et.al. a happy, healthy, safe and prosperous year. May we know peace and love and take comfort that the Jewish people still strive and flourish in this world of ours.

5767 and still counting! Bust out the apples n' honey, cuz I'm a get my dip on!!

PEACE!

Done.

EM

City vs. City

You know something, I love Toronto, a truly great city. We've got festivals (TIFF parties anyone?), we've got big business, fantastic restaurants and such culturally diverse parts of our fair city. Then there's Montreal...they've got, the Just For Laughs Festival. Click on the title link of this entry and you'll see what I'm getting at.

I wonder if she does kid's birthday parties?

I'm Inga, from Sveeden, ya?!

2:00am(ish) and you know what that means - yep, up n' bloggin' away. Sleep? Can't do that. Why, you ask (or don't ask, yet for literary purposes I have taken the liberty to do so on your behalf, and speaking of literaryness - oh that'll be a word soon - ever read instructions on a ketchup bottle that's not Heinz??) well, because I've got an IKEA mattress. Y'see, I was fortunate enough to have had a small fortune spent on my goregous bedroom set - and it's served me well, however, it appears as though the proverbial "buck" stopped just short of a fuckin' comfortable/supportive mattress!!

So, what's a Canuck to do? Go to the Swedish Meatball Emporium that has so skillfully managed to induce a trance-like spell over the female populous, and get me a fuukkin' maatress!! Smorgesbourg (how the fuck do you spell that at 2am eh?!) to end all Shmoregsborgs (went with an alternate sp. on purpose - still no clue at 2am and too lazy to Websterize it - so too shall that be a word soon my pretty!) we go up to IKEA and lo and behold thar she blow - the mattress.

Oh Swedish consortium of plastic screws n' wooden bench like furniture that looks as though the Amish are getting stoned while workin', will your wonders ne'er cease?

They can cram a fuukin' lightbulb that's square-shaped into a socket that's round-holed but they can't make a bloody mattress properly? At present (and there's been confirmation on this one) I've got a sink-hole in the middle of the bloody thing so I'm hammocked into my own frame. Worse still, I've flipped it and flopped it, twisted and turned it and its still shite.

"Hey Ellie, why don't ya shuddup n' get a new mattress already" you say (and if you did say it like that, what's with the Yosemite Sam thing ya got goin' on??!!), well I would 'cept my penchant for the somewhat extravagant yet equally comfy mattresses has found me in search of....

THE BELLAGIO BED!

So, what prey tell is this "bellagio bed" I speak of?? Well, to be honest if you've ever stayed at the Bellagio in Las Vegas - they're beds are absolutely, 100% without a doubt the bestest, softest, yet equally firmest, lushest, relaxingest mattress I've ever had the priviledge and pleasure to rest my body (no doubt forever altered due to the shape of all things Swedish) EVER!!!

Problem is - Bellagio bed mattress runs for around $2500CDN. Steep, n'est pas?

So, I guess the only logical thing to do is to start a fundraiser. That's right, for a mere $100-potentially-tax-deductible-donation, you can help a sleepless student find his stride (plus the lady'll love it too - see, that's another problem, we're having mattress compatibility issues, but that's another blog altogether) not to mention a few zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

While I recognize that this is the 2nd blatant time that I've hit you, the reader up fo' some papah, it's for a good cause. Better sleep = better blogging (and other important stuff too, in case mom n' dad are reading this one)!!

And to the bastooords at IKEA - your self-assembly-no-english-words-nor-any-known-text-or-font-both-modern-and-ancient-alike-instruction-manual-$0.99-swedish-buffet-breakfast-toting-deal-sucking-fake-plant-odds-n'-ends-crap-on-sale-plastic-spatula-reinventing-shite-art-500sq.ft-model-home-with-inadequate-spacing-useless-fake-tv-floor-model-maze-winding-vomit-inducing-bland-white-paint-student-budget-newlywed-target-market-weird-pet-names-to-all-your-furniture-overcharging-for-delivery-never-able-to-find-a-sales-associate-that-isn't-being-stalked-by-293-customers-at-the-same-time-furniture-puncturing-resistence-test-glass-encased-displaying days are definetly hereby put on notice.

By the way, did you see the new catalogue - interesting stuff...damn, its like a disease!!

Holy Crap - it's SEPTEMBER!

So a lil' glance at the 'ol calendar reveals that its officially September 1st - summer's all but dead, school's around the corner (man that's weird to write/say/think/do), weather's chilling off a bit, one year anniversary's comin' up (on the 3rd - yay, shameless personal plug!), and television will start to air fresh material - hopefully it will be great television - not that I'll have much time to watch, what with my newfound homework schedule...oy.


'Nuff for now...

Done.
Peace.

EM

The Levmeister doin' his "thang"

Martin Levy large n' in charge:

Dr. & Mrs. DeBora - August 20, 2006

As promised - a wedding update, avec pictures (and they say we're not bilingual)!!

To the left, you'll see the Lipmans (sexy as usual) with a stunning photo of Jodi in a beautiful green dress (I think that dress is gettin' more press time than Bin Laden).

Here's a photo of the galant bride and groom - Tijana & Jaime- and of course, myself and the fantastic Jodi.

The bride and groom's first dance - them lessons sure paid off...all in all a great night! MAZEL TOV to Tijana n' Jaime!!

On MTV...

I know I promised you all an update on the wedding - and believe me, that'll be coming up soon, but I have to get this off my chest. For the past two days I've been mostly holed up at home, b/c I tore some ligaments in my ankle - while WALKING - genius, I know.

Anyhow, the doctors said that I did a real good job on it, and it'll be a while before I'm pain-free. So what's a guy to do all day at home - you got it - watch tv! What's on tv you ask?? You got it, NOTHING.

So as I'm channel surfing through all 575 channels, I come across MTV. Now, I know some of you guys have been watching their shows and there's been a lot of hype with MTV, so being somewhat incapacitated, I decided to check it out.

MTV FUCKIN' SUCKS. The shows are weird, stupid, annoying, surreal, funny, tacky, outrageous and all in all ADDICTIVE. Annoying "VJ's" aside (does anyone realize that MTV stands for Music Television, yet these bastards don't show any music videos on their shows), the shows are all just...well...stupid, yet, I like them. There's this one show I saw called "My Super Sweet 16" - where its basically rich lil' brats whose daddy's drive wicked mahvelous Mercs n' Ferarris and they throw their future whoore crack addicts the most outrageous and lavish birthday parties.

As I write this, there's an annoying show on called MADE - where in this particular episode, the Lacrosse jock with the hot girlfriend wants to be of all things, a FIGURE SKATER!!!!!!! This shit is so scripted and annoying...what I can't figure out is how they've managed to sell it to America (and obviously now Canada too). I'm convinced that they could slap a fat guy on the ass for 30 minutes and it'd be a hot show too...weird.

This blog probably isn't making much sense, maybe its the pain. Gonna grab the Advil. Thanks for indulging me. I'll be sure to post updates from Jaime n' Tijana's wedding.

Done.

Peace.

EM

It's not what you think...

Now, before I even start this one, you all know very well, that my loyalty lies with the Blue n' White - Toronto Maple Leafs - but...I did see this off TSN's website and well...its pretty damn cool. Click on the title of this blog - the link will take you to a website this fan created for the Buffal0 Sabres - he basically redesigned their uniforms to a throwback of the originals...but with a really impressive twist.

Clearly this guy has waaaay too much time on his hands, but nonetheless it did look pretty damn cool. Personally, I hope they do go back to a new look, 'cause it'll be interesting to see how fashionable they look when we're cramming pucks down their throats!! GO LEAFS GO!!!

www.newblueandgold.com (just in case).

Summer Slow-down

'Sup? I know, I know, bad Ellie...can't keep up with the Jonses (or Levys or Spivaks for that matter) when it comes to the bloggage.

Forgive me Reader, for I have sinned - it has been nearly one month since my last Blog; in that time I've managed to stay afloat at camp, see a few cinematic features on pirated DVD's, prepare for a wonderous/joyous occasion that is to be Tijana & Jaime's wedding (updates on that story next week), and perhaps most importantly - I've been losing weight. I'm down 15 pounds in the course of roughly one month - now, I'm not gonna say where I am or where I was at - at least not yet...I've got a lofty goal and I'd rather "reveal" it at, upon completion - p.s. it's ok to cheat every now and again.

So, why aren't I sleeping you might ask?? Well, y'see dear reader, I suffer for your reading pleasure - that and the fact that only a half hour ago, some of the poker fiends left my home - leaving some cash behind (for once!!!), and well, its just so fun to count loonies n' toonies... hey, shouldn't it be "Twonies" ?? What's up with that? Our currency is stupid.

ok, more blogging soon.

Pre-emptive mazel tov to the bride n' groom, and a hearty welcome home to those who were out of town and have now returned -glorious and americanized!! (that'd be you Craig n' Gabe).

Done.
Peace.

EM

P.S. - if you're wondering about my two cents on the War with Hizbullah - I can fill you in, but the "blog" will take a while...thanks!

P.P.S. - Miami Vice - upon closer inspection, this appears to be a not-so-good-movie. Having second thoughts...oh well.

Done for real.

EM

I STAND WITH ISRAEL...DO YOU?

UNITED TOGETHER!

Last night, amongst the 5000+ strong Jewish and non-Jewish supporters for the State of Israel who were present at the Stand With Israel Rally I was proud. Proud not only to be a Jew, a Zionist, an ardent supporter of the Jewish State of Israel, but most importantly, I was proud to be a Canadian and a Torontonian (ok, technically I'm a Thornhiller, but still you get the picture).

What I was rather disappointed (and I hope I'm proven wrong about this) is that it didn't seem to me as though there were many of our community's youth and/or young professionals et.al. present.

I know that people have their lives to live and socializing can at times take priority, however if you think about the more than 1,000,000 (ONE MILLION) Israelis whose lives have been ground to a halt due to terrorist attacks along their Northern border, don't you think that sacrificing an evening or two to show them that you care, that you sympathize, that you understand - isn't that worth missing out on a pub night or a chick flick or whatever???

You don't have to be political to show your support. You don't have to wave a flag, or be a member of a given political party. You don't have to be an Israeli, you don't have to have ever travelled to the region. You don't have to be Jewish, and you don't have to be apathetic. You have to be a human being and recognize that your fellow brothers and sisters are fighting and dying for their country, for freedom, for democracy, for their basic right to exist. Any Canadian, and human being so adamantly opposed, or worse so indifferent to the plight of our Israeli brothers and sisters should be ashamed.

To those of you whom I know who weren't there last night at the Toronto Performing Arts Centre, please, be sure to be there the next time - and hopefully there won't be a next time. All it takes is to have your heart in a good place and your willingness to STAND and be counted as a true friend.

May G-d watch over and bless the State of Israel, her soldiers and her citizens alike. May they be kept safe and return to their homes and cities and villages and shops and businesses so very, very soon and may the innocent people of Lebanon know peace in the coming days. May they know that their Israeli and Canadian cousins are eagerly awaiting the day to share laughs and meals rather than grief, sorrow and bombs.

Peace.

Done.

EM

"the pic"

So, now that I've figured out how to post pics, I figure it's time to put up "the pic". You all know the story by now, and if you don't then you can ask me and I'll be happy to recount the tale for you over a nice pint of beer.

Ciao for now.

Done.

EM

Support Israel

BRINGIN' THE PAIN SINCE '48!

Dear Hizbullah,

DON'T FUCK WITH US!

The New Routine

Summer is here and with summer comes a new routine. Oddly, for myself this "newness" I speak of is really, well, old. The saying "it's like riding a bike" has come in handy for me the past few weeks as I'm getting back into the swing of things at camp.

Camp, if you don't know, requires some much needed illusion, allusion and best of all confusion (see, it's working already). There's got to be a "new you" at camp. I'm not the same "me" that I am when I'm with my friends or family (though, I will not lie entirely and say that I change so drastically. A lot of "me" is still "me" whether its at camp or at home etc.).

You have to reinvent yourself so as to preserve sanity. I now find myself waking up and in a state of typical zombiness, readying my shiny blue uni, and selecting an article of swimwear for the day. Grab the lunch that was made (thanks mom! Ya, that's right my mom makes my lunch - sometimes - you got a fuckin' problem with that?? didn't think so!!!), or I make my lunch in somewhat of a haste, have some breaky, grab my faux-tilly (thanks Costco!) load up on the sunscreen and stroll out to the mini-bus (yep, the "special" one) and commence my co-captainness of Bus 6.

Then its a bumpy, oft sweltering lil' drive through the familiar scenery of T-hill and voila...destination reached. Unload the lil' cute tikes on their respective cabins/counsellors and its on to meet my devil children. They're not all that bad - but put together as a group of 12 and its a "Dirty Dozen" indeed.

After about 3 fantasmal 35 minute sessions of various activities (be it drum circle, rock climb, archery, golf, baseball, drama, cooking etc.) its off to outdoor instructional swim!!

As the lil' shits drown, er, learn to swim, I casually soak the feet in the pool, workin' on the tan [I don't swim b/c a) its an instructional lesson and that would mean I'd either be getting in the way, or getting an unwanted/unnecessary swimming lesson, and b) I've only dressed in bathing suit, wetting it now rather than at 230 would mean that I'd have to endure crotch rot for far too long a time and that's just not in the cards] and overall enjoying the fact that the lifeguards have to put up with my lil' buggers for 35 mins!

After the change its off to one more activity and then...LUNCH.

Now, you'd think this would be a fun relaxing time for us, huh? Nope. Gotta get 'em sitting at their table, eating their packed lunches - of course all of them want the "lunch program" that you gotta shell out extra cash for, which includes a lucrative bag 'o chips...man oh man how they bargain for a bag o' chips.

Then comes the impromptu cabin cheering/ragging contest. My kids have no spirit. None. Zero. I've encouraged their creative juices but it seems alas, that their juice has run out. So while other cabins come up with some creative and let's not forget deafening cheers, my guys just sit their pining for chips.

Clean up and then its two more activities before swim time - indoors!

Here's where I unload, cool off and get wet. Thanks to the extra towels provided by the facility, I can now afford to leave my precious cottons at home!!

Toss a few kids around the pool (they like it), get out, quickie shower to rinse off and its back to the home base (under the big tree) for some popsicles, daily trivia/skill challenges, of which the winning cabin gets a pizza party (you'll note that my kids lost out last week b/c they lacked one particular skill - SPIRIT aka CHEERING. Had they had that, we'd have been the Prized Pepperonis er, cheese err..whatever it'd have been a better lunch for sure...). Then as a bus captain its time to head up the hill, grab the attendance clipboard then do my best boxing ring-girl immitation, waiting for the little darlings to come on home.

Dropped off before 5 and voila!

Rinse, Wash, Repeat.. 6 more weeks... I'm getting too old for this shit - Cap'n Murtaugh.

Hmmm, maybe that'll be my new nicname at camp...hahaha I made myself laugh.

Done.

PEACE (except for the part where we must destroy Hizbullah/Hamas/Syria and Iran)

EM

WAR - I'll tell you what it's good for...

So unless you've been living under a rock for the past 72 hours, it seems that the shit has once again hit the fan in the Middle East and it only appears that it's gonna get a bit worse before it gets...a bit worse?!

While my extended family is spending every spare moment in a bomb shelter, once again the world's general consensus is that ISRAEL IS TO BLAME...hmmm, let's see...Israel pulls out of Lebanon 6 years ago. Israel pulls out of Gaza a little over a year ago, and what happens?? Twice within a period of two weeks, Israel is infiltrated by terrorist scum, soldiers aged 18-23 are kidnapped and killed. What are they supposed to do??

I say carpet bomb Gaza, Lebanon, Hamas, Hizbullah and while you're at it - NUKE Iran and Syria. It's time for the world to wake the fuck up!!! This is the world's war on terror and its being fought by the only nation willing to stand up to terror!!!

Israel is 100% right in its actions - you want to sponsor terrorism and hatred, then you're gonna get burned (literally)!!

If you can't stand the heat of your Katyusha's don't cry when you feel the wrath of the F-16's!!!

Just needed to say it. I don't really care about comments on this one. Too pissed. Too scared to care.


Done.

Peace/War

EM

On Nature

A note to parents who read this blog (it's possible): Your kids and torrential downpours, don't, I repeat, don't mix!

So a wonderful day at camp today: wake up, its drizzling...ok, I can handle that no problem. No sooner than I climb up the steps to the bus and those doors shut behind me signaling the start to my new found hell, do the skies open and yield a steady stream of soaky goodness (working on the aliteration, they don't just accept anyone to teacher's college these days, do they?? DON'T ANSWER THAT!)

-SIDE NOTE - ROGERS WIRELESS CUSTOMER SERVICE HOLD MUZAK HAS TAKEN ITS PENULTIMATE TURN FOR THE WORSE!!

Anyhoo, so we get to camp and its raining...so we're huddled off into the Arts n' Farts, er, Crafts tent - soon it smelled like farts (and no, it wasn't me, honest!) - so now we're stuck in this 30x50ish sized tent that's bolted into the ground (important info for later). All our specialty activities have either been cancelled or are being delivered directly to us, so that we don't have to move.

LUNCH TIME...yum. While we're eating hot mac n' sauce (it wasn't cheese) Mother Nature and G-d Almighty take the weather into overdrive...we're still in these shite tents, stuffy, and the kids doing what they do best (deafening lil' suckers) - when the longest, loudest, boomiest crack of thunder ever heard by human ears lets loose - and wouldn't you know it, so too cometh the wind, the rain and the pain!

The tent's walls are wailing in the wind - and who's job is it to secure them b/c the other 16 yr. old staff are shitting their pants too much to worry about their kids?? Uhuh, so here I am doing my best Giligan impression, girls and boys alike are crying, surely a tornado is imminent...and what's the plan, you ask??? Why, let's somehow get these guys onto waiting buses and take them down to Newtonbrook Bowlerama for some hectic bowling action! WOOHOO!

By the way, I'm amazed at the strength of my cabin - these lil' guys (9-11 yrs old) are lifting the size 14, 15, 16 pound bowling balls like they were made of paper - but man when they let 'er rip..I think we broke the floors and the gutters!!

So, after nearly losing 4 kids and 7 of them almost breaking their toes (or someone else's) we get back just in time for me to climb off one stuffy, steamy yellow-mobile onto another so that I can accompany good 'ol BUS 6 home - the highlight being that it stopped raining and we could open the windows...

I had such a wonderful day. To think, only 33 more just like it!

PEACE

Done.
EM

NOW BLOG THIS, NOW BLOG THIS...

The Blogger has returned...long live the Blogger!

After a lengthy and rather ill-conceived absence from the blogosphere, much like Superman (and Captain Jack Sparrow) - I HAVE RETURNED!

So much has happened I just don't know where to begin, though I hear the start's as good a place as any, however, seeing as how I like to mix it up - I'm gonna work my way backwards...

TODAY - Toronto Gran Prix (a.k.a. Molson Indy) - fantabulous (its a word) day! Jodi and I attended the race in fantastic fashion and witnessed an amazing crash at Turn 3...no drivers were hurt in the hurtling of all things fibreglass/metallic. Further to today, Italia 'as 'a won da Worlde Cupa! Viva L'Italia! (AZZURI, AZZURI) - Marty's hurtin' at that one (though I will admit I did pick Portugal and they still bested Rooney et.al)!

LAST WEEK - Richmond Hill Country Club Day Camp - I am now spending my days with the kiddies all coddled in their country club environment, whilst the boys play rock n' roll, these kids just eat, burp, go hyper, swim, more hyper and well...its just Camp, right? At least I can work on the tan.

PRIOR TO LAST WEEK - Basically, been on m' arse waiting for Teacher's College to get under way. Been seeing friends, new and old alike and enjoying their respective company...

BIRTHDAY - Part a) Snorkelling with Sharks in the D.R.!!! Part b) A surprising surprise party - to which I truly had no clue was in the works up until I spotted the RKT NGN outside JoJo's house...shoulda' moved the vehicle...but it was a thoughtful idea nonethenone. Part c) Culminated this weekend as darling Jodi bought me a 3-Day Pass to the Gran Prix of Toronto (aka Molson Indy) of which I'd never attended - GLAD I DID NOW! WOOHOO! I had lots of fun...lots of walking...the best part was when I ______________ (Jodi knows this part)!!!!

Now you're all caught up more or less...more consistent bloggage on the way kids!

A'Salaaam Aleychem....


PEACE.
Done.

EM










I miss him too JoJo. :(

YES I'M STILL HERE

not to worry, i'm still around. this is just a temporary message to let you know a true blog (or two thousand) will be arriving shortly. thank you for your patience, understanding, and snarky commentary.

love you all, practically the same way you love me.

you do love me, don't you?

Back from the Beach!

Well kids, the Jet has landed...literally, in every sense. Back from vacay in Punta Cana - the trip was amazing, the sights, the surf, the sand, the food, the fun, the company (as always) - all things vacationary were fabulous.

I'm tired.

Nightey night wabbit...

Done

EM

R and R

Canadians are getting shafted. There's a report going 'round how we Canucks are getting less vacay time than our European brothers and sisters.

Whilst our Mother Colony, her freaky French/Spanish cousins and lest we forget the Deutschlanders and Italianos all get to bask in the warm Caribbean sun for at least 3-4 weeks, we pride ourselves on taking an average of only 19 days (down from 21 last year) off for our annual family trips to Disneyland - in the car no less!! WOOHOO!!!

So...I propose a national referrendum on vacations. We must adopt an annual minimum paid vacation break of at least one month - August, perhaps. August is nice - don't you think?

Did you know that in France, people save for the vacations, and should they run out of money to buy the essentials - say, Milk or Eggs or Bread etc...they'd sooner eat roaches or worms than touch the vacation money - granted they're French but still...that's commitment!

Well, I'm glad I got that off my chest - and so now, if you all don't mind, I'm going to go on vacation - one week (as per the Cdn. standard) in the sun and it'll be fun!

Done.
EM

Once Every Four Years...

A brief blog here everyone, just to update you on how the music of one band has managed to motivate/inspire the world of sport. I've been saying it for a while, and it seems that the kids over at ESPN have caught on...U2 will be the official band and City of Blinding Lights the official song of the FIFA World Cup of Soccer 2006 tourney in Germany.
Watch it. Listen. Love it.

The title of this blog has been hyperlinked to the commercial spots - a bevy of beautiful commercials - check on the pop-up window's bottom right corner for details...

PEACE.
Done.

EM

The Goal is Soul or um _____ ?!?

In keeping up with or rather simply copying (yet with a hopefully marked improvement upon) the Joneses, so to speak, I have decided to hop on the paperclip bandwagon and start my revolution!

I am hereby accepting trade offers for the following item: ONE TV TRAY, WITH FOLD-UP LEGS.

The goal here, is to trade this item up n' up until I have something that I have always wanted: EXTREME FAME AND FORTUNE. I want to be famous and rich, or for that matter, rich and famous (I'm not opposed to their exact order). In exchange for trading upwards for these two intangiables, I propose to trade something else... a portion of both my newfound fame and fortune will be used only for good. I will donate percentages of both my fame and fortune for the betterment of our planet and civilization as a whole.

So, having said that, what have you got to offer me??

I am now accepting trades - the offer stands - ONE TV TRAY, WITH FOLDING LEGS in return for: ______________! (?)

(please note that the winning trade will be published here on my blog)

HAPPY TRADING EVERYONE! (this is not a joke, serious trades only please - I reserve the right to republish your trade offers. If you wish, you may email me at: letsmakeatrade@hotmail.com)

PEACE!

Done.

EM

On Relations...sorta, and umm, other stuff too!

...on both personal, customer/consumer and "other" types...

So, firstly, I've been AWOL with a lot of you, not personal, just timing, shitty, shitty timing. For that...I apologise.

I'm in love. Love isn't always the easiest thing to be in...but its soooo satisfying when its good - and this, is good. You're good, babe...yes...you!

I have amazing friends - you're only as good as your friends, and as previously mentioned, I have amazing friends - therefore, by some insane logic, one could argue that I'm amazing (one's trying to argue that I'm sexy, but that's another blog altogether) , but I know you, my friends, my readers well enough not to bother with such false logic.

I love my family - nuff said on that point. I'd go to jail/take a bullet/kill a rodent/squash a spider for you all, anytime. You're wonderful and supportive and for this I'm truly grateful - though I don't think any of my family have actually read this blog. Oh well, its on record.

No - I'm not sucking up, its just that for a while I haven't been able to say what's on my mind b/c I wasn't so sure what it is that's on my mind exactly, but now I do and so I'm airing the laundry - not that its particularly in need of airing/dirty per se.

Per se - I love saying that. So...professional.

Money - I have none. I need loads of it. If you have some to spare, I could really use a square...OY! I did that...just now, I cheesily ripped off a Seinfeldian reference to toilet paper in regards to my lack of funds. Sheesh. No good.

Ok, so now to the rant...

FUCK SAMSUNG ELECTRONICS CORP! EAT SHITE ROGERS COMMUNICATIONS LTD! DIE YOU MISERABLE FUCKERS AT VISA!

Nowhere in this world, I'm now convinced, that offers the notion of Customer SERVICE, can you find such incomptence than right here in the land of Maple Trees n' Leafs!

48 minutes - that's how long it took to get someone to talk to me that a) had command of the english language b) had some of "authority to discuss such matters" - and y'know what kills me here...is that this is actually par for most corporate giants who have not only long forgotten about the lil' guy, but they've already gone n' ass-raped him so much that he could literally shit a watermelon - WHOLE with not even the slightest groan/whimper that a dog could hear!

..and if that's not enough, my favourite Gap Jeans (insert free plug here) just ripped in the back ass-pocket - and I haven't the slightest clue as to how.

The Lord works in mysterious ways - how the good people get shafted to the bottom, while moronic idiots without so much as a shred of original thought are propelled to the top amazes, nay, startles me!

Ahhh, much better. I think I have anger issues...uhoh, can' o worms much?!

I feel like I'm having diarrhea of the mouth/mind/fingers on here, and I guess that's good b/c as mentioned previously, haven't been on here as often as I should. Its theraputic. Now if only someone could cure my stupid scratchy throat/sneezy and running nose...mmmm, yummy!

My neck hurts - and its all your fault. You know who you are. I love you anyways, but still...owwww.

Ya that's right, I'm bitchin', moanin', complainin', and there's nothin' you can do to stop me (I didn't want to add the "d").

Some genius I recently picked up - MORE IS LOST TO INDECISION, THAN TO WRONG DECISION.

Peace.
Done.

EM

At the movies...

so um... ya, been a tad lazy here n' I'm sorry. Just saw RV - the "comedy" with Robin Williams, and while its not drop-dead-laugh-out-loud-funny, its got some humouristic moments.

Ahh, levity.

Robin, let's just hope your next movie Man of the Year and/or Mrs. Doubtfire 2 (ya, that's right a sequel) will be much better.
much, much, much....please.

OK kids, I promise to put on some stuff of value on here shortly...thanks for the patience. oh and by the way...I've altered my fundraising goal to something a little more reasonable - $500 for the UJA Walk With Israel on Sunday May 28, 2006!

Please, if you have a moment, donate to a worthwhile cause. Here's the link: https://secure.e2rm.com/registrant/personalPage.aspx?EventID=5317&LangPref=en-CA&RegistrationID=164402

I personally thank you for your time and generosity!

PEACE!

Done.

EM

Where for art thou, blogger?

Friends, Blog-readers, Donors - lend me your wallets (coin purses are acceptable too)!

Forgive me Bloggians, for it has been one week since my last solicitation. I know I've neglected this realm of cyber-space for far too long, and I am here to make ammends - and yet another pitch for cash! C'mon kids, in the spirit of giving - give! I have set an ambitious amount as my target for fundraising, and this past weekend, I witnessed first-hand the power of ambition.

I volunteered for the MS Society's WALK for a Cure for MS up in the Kawartha Lakes region. My pride n' joy fundraising guru of a girlfriend, Jodi, co-ordinated this magnificent event and it went off without so much as a hitch, let alone glitch! To see a community band together to raise money and raise awareness of a cause so near and dear to them was heart-warming to say the least.

Me, I just tried to stay out of the way and just do my part. And so, now that the weekend has come and gone, I am renewed in my quest to raise money for a cause near and dear to my heart. I will not exploit your heartstrings, rather, I'm looking for you to search your own, along with your pursestrings and just give, its tax-deductible for those of you for whom its important, but its just plain good to do.

I've managed to raise $116 so far, a mere $884 away from my goal of $1000!!! To those who've donated, thank you! To those thinking of donating and have yet to do so, Thank you, in advance!

OK, so let's go out there n' give one for the gipper!

On a complete side-note, I just received my Sopranos Boxed Set from China - at a fraction of the cost here in T.O. - and I've already finished Season 1. Man that show is mad-addictive!

I miss you too!

Done
EM

"My Blogger's Back and you're gonna be in trouble..."

Hey All! In a spirited rip-off of an old lyric, I have returned to the world ' o blog!

And, in keeping with the spirit of musical lyrics, but to my unexpectedly favourite surprise in the National Post's "Avenue" section, a recent U.K. poll on music lyrics was published. According to those members of the Great British Empire, their favourite song lyric of all time is:

One Life, With Each Other, Sisters, Brothers - U2

And, if that's not enough, in the fun lil' list of the Top 100, the Irish Uber Group managed to take up spots in the # 11 and 98 position with I want to run, I want to hide, I want to tear down the walls, that hold me inside... and One man come on a barbed wire fence, One man he resist, One man washed on an empty beach, One man betrayed with a kiss... respectively.

So, other than that...what else is going on?

Pesach is still on, yum, maztah!
Leafs are out of contention and in contempt with a lot of people.
Tehran is scaring the living shit outta people and in my humble opinion needs to be tought an intrinsic lesson on the effects of an A-bomb going off right up your arse...
Still working on my movie script which I hope to post soon...
Still working on collecting donations for support for my WALK With Israel campaign - up to $100 or so - shy about $900 for my goal, and I could really, really, really, use your support.

Ok, no real rhyme or reason to this one, so I guess I'll just leave you with the idea that Oh you look so beautiful tonight...

Please give: https://secure.e2rm.com/registrant/personalPage.aspx?EventID=5317&LangPref=en-CA&RegistrationID=164402


Done.

EM

Passover

Well, 'tis the season once again, where, much like the vast majority of professional schools choose to "passover" my application, we the Jews find the time to schmooze n' eat unleavened bread (a.k.a. Matza) and celebrate the holy holiday of Passover (Pesach, Pesah, No-bread-week).

No real bloggin' here 'cept to say "Chag Sameach to you and yours and all of theirs this lovely year" - translation - HAPPY PASSOVER!

To my non-Jewish readers (I'm not sure I have any to be honest, 'cause I don't think Craig reads this thing and, well quite frankly he's an Honourary Heeb - like the shirt says)...you're welcome to drop in (if I know you) and take part in our celebration - or you could wait for the DVD edition of OUR SEDER due out in stores in early May...

Moses, OUT!

Done.

EM

"Call it in the air"

So...Wow, been some interesting and rather sophistimicated talk as of late, and well, that's good!

Heads its Michigan, Tails its UofT - wha????? Where did UofT come from? More specifically, OISE - the Teacher's College??? Well kids, seems a funny thing happened to me on the way home from a birthright israel alumni meeting - I come home and to my extreme shock and pleasure is a simple looking manilla envelope from OISE addressed to yours truly.

Well, I opened it and no sooner than I read the first line's words - "we are pleased to offer you admission to our program" than I nearly fainted from shock.

See, I "dreamed" that if I do get into UofT (this is the segway back to our recent posting) - I'd go! And so now, I am wrestling with the decision of Law School or Teacher's College.

...and the winner is.... ME! B/c no matter what I choose, I'll have made the right choice for me and that's what's important.
However, to answer your question Mr. K - it'll be UofT for me!

I'm going to be a teacher, an educator, a facillitator of our youth's acquisition of knowledge - god help you all! muahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!


P.S. - In the spirit of shameless promotion for fundraisers - a) if you haven't already done so, donate to Jodi's WALK. b) if you haven't already done so, and many of you have yet to, please, please, please send in your tax-deductible pledge for my UJA Walk with Israel - Many thanks!

For your donating pleasure:

https://secure.e2rm.com/registrant/personalPage.aspx?EventID=5317&LangPref=en-CA&RegistrationID=164402

RE: To coin-flip or not to coin-flip - see Marto's Blog for details!

Fate. Kismet. Chance. Coincidence. Whatever.

As I came across Marty's blog - the Steve Jobs' addresse - I thought the apple doesn't fall far from the ipod! I further went on to read Levs' apology (not the "i'm sorry" type, the other...look it up!) for Jobs' and his commentary. Then, to add onto that, I checked out the comments by anonymous (I'm assuming either IK or SAJ). So, naturally, I felt the need to chip-in-my-two-cents!

As inspiring as Jobs' speech was (and you should read it), and as realistic as Marty's dissection of said speech was, the fact remains that in one's life, one must make their own decisions.

I'm an expert on this topic, and as I stated at the begining (kinda), this particular posting on Marty's site was fate, etc. For I have been contemplating and dissecting and introspecting and suspecting and any other "ing" you wanna use for the past few weeks/months (possibly years, though maybe in my subconsciousness).

I have a decision to make. It's a biggie too - and no, its not about whether or not to watch this movie or that movie or to colour-code my closet - but it's about my life (and to me, that's a big deal).

I need to decide what is it exactly that I'm going to do for a career. Am I going to reach for the stars, dream big dreams, accept my fate, further accept my reality, take control of my destiny or be led like a sheep in the heard. Furthermore, if I ultimately choose to step right, will I REGRET years later perhaps, that I did not choose to turn left instead?

Can I live with such second-guessing? Should anyone? And so, then I come across these posts/commentaries and I laugh. Irony is a bitch! I don't quite know where I'm going with this, so forgive the ramblings of a babbling Jew, but I think you just helped make my decision making process slightly less askew.

The fact remains that there's nothing wrong with reaching beyond the heavens for that piece of fame or golden horseshoe or whatever - famous actor? star poker-player? first person in their neighbourhood to eat 350 frozen dinners in 24-hour period - whatever! On the flip side, there's nothing wrong with staying the course, settling for a more reasonable and/or achieveable and ultimately sustainable career. $65,000/year is good coin. $100K is better and yet, $24,500 is enough to survive on too!

I think the true test here, is not to dream of running away to India or wherever (why India only Vishnu knows, me personally, I'd have analagized somewhere like Colombia or Peru or San Salvador). And as a brief aside - even if you choose India etc. so what?! The bottom line - you have to accept your choice. You have to be content that it's the right move for you. This choice is not meant to be easy or fun or fulfilling for that matter - that's for the future to play out.

Life's a bitch sometimes. Good people get fucked over for no reason, bad people sneak on by, fence-sitters eventually get hemherroids - and its hard, trust me, its very hard to watch those you admire/respect/envy/hate/whatever pass you by. They're seemingly making the right choices and doing well - but reality is that they're doing what's right for them - and they may or may not be loving the process just the same!

Advice, whether solicited or not, is merely the opinions/guidance/experiences of those who've been "there" before you. Advice is all around us. I've gotten some fantastic advice recently - more like perspective, but it's the same thing. The reason I say its so fantastic, is that sadly its been barely uttered by the words of a loveable, dying woman. Though frail and sadly beaten by the motherfucker that is cancer - her mind is razor-sharp! Her words, are poignant, succinct, brutally honest and most of all sincere. They're painfully uttered with the goal of helping me to steer clear of ill-decisions. I appreciate them, and I will do my utmost to honour them, and to honour her alike. I've clearly rambled and babbled waaaay off course. I have a lot on my mind.

I do however think, that in the end, when you're alone with your thoughts and memories, you have to hope that you've done well. Be proud of your decisions, accept fate sometimes, other times, control the destiny of your universe, manipulate the outcome, rig the game, give to charity, kiss your mother, hug your father, smile at strangers, play with children, colour outside of the lines, splurge on gifts - for you, for those you love, for those you're trying to love - take a chance, test boundaries, get into a fight, make up, stand-up for your principles, learn when to back down, argue, listen, sleep-in - a lot!, apologize, fuck' em, do for yourself, do for others, steal something, return a lost/found item, be yourself, make up a story...bottom line - choose. struggle with choice. and then...as hard as it is...decide - that's where I'm at now, and let me tell you it's not fun, but deep down I rely on the fact that ultimately, I'll have done my best, and in the end that's all I care about.

Thanks for reading, thanks to Marty, thanks to Steve Jobs.

P.S. Nothing wrong with being Bono - other than the fact that no one, not on this earth or elsewhere can ever BE BONO...only Bono is Bono!

Just be a U2 Fan instead!

Done.

EM

There's No NATION like DONATION!

Hey guys, looks like the donation bug is spreading - I've decided to throw my hat in the ring and raise some funds for the Walk for Israel on Sunday May 28, 2006!

I would greatly appreciate your support - just click on the link below and any amount you're able to give is greatly appreciated - and, its TAX DEDUCTIBLE!! God Bless Tax Loopholes!

Thanks!

Done.

EM



https://secure.e2rm.com/registrant/personalPage.aspx?EventID=5317&LangPref=en-CA&RegistrationID=164402

A Blog a Day, Keeps the ??? Away!

Speechless. I'm utterly speechless. I have nothing to say (which, as many of you who know me, is a true rarity). Alas, I have come to the realization that today, and indeed for much of the past few weeks, I just don't have anything to say.

That's bothersome. Also, I'm becoming increasingly forgetful. For instance, I was about to say something, to write it down here in blog-o-world, and I forgot. Which leads me back to my first point - I have nothing to say.

Maybe, maybe there's some conspiracy out there...someone's seeping into my inner thoughts and extracting them, leaving me speechless and forgetful at the same time. While you might argue the ill-effects of paranoia, you might be wrong, and as scary as it sounds, I might be right - actually, that doesn't sound so scary at all...I quite like the sound of that really - I AM RIGHT.


Ohhh, I've got an idea for a movie - it's actually not my idea, but I was certainly influenced by something I saw on TV - mmmmm, tv, is there anything you don't know?!? - anyways, Jon Stewart said something in passing and well, I'm gonna write a script of sorts - and I'll be posting it online - bits and pieces at a time - and hopefully, it will be good, you'll like it and heck, I'll even take some creative input from you my readers, and you'll even get a writing credit or something. Then, when I become a big-shot Hollywood type, I won't forget you, I'll invite you out to my amazing Villa and we'll party and carry on like the rich mofo's we are...and it'll be all b/c I WAS RIGHT.

Much love to you all...enjoy the script to come!

Done.

EM

Bureaucratic Bastards!

So, did you know that the freakin' government can suspend your driver's licence without prior notice? No? Well, now you do!

These lame-duck bureaucratic motherf*@#$@s decided to show me how they can flex their tiny muscles!

Apparently, I missed paying a speeding ticket - ok, guilty on that, but no reminder letter or nothing. No courtesy mailing. Zip. Just get a random phone call saying my ass is going to collections unless I pay off this stupid fine within 3 hours!

Ok, so I pay the fine (as I was supposed to, only now with added juice for some fuckin' flavour) and I think I'm done right? wrong!

The bitch (and I'll explain soon why I'm calling her that) tells me I'm good to go - except that my licence has been suspended!!!!

After coming too from that giant slap upside my head, I ask this "woman" how do I go about unsuspending my licence. She tells me all I have to do is go down to the MTO and pony up some money (surprise, surprise!) and voila - done.

So I head down (ya, I drove, fuck 'em!) to the MTO shop and a lovely young lady informs me that there's a delay pending on my account, and that I'm going to be suspended for a few days more - unless I can get the court lady to fax a document to their office - no problem I say, as I start dialing the myriad of digits it takes to crack through to a human being.

I get through (38.12 minutes later) and ask the same unpleasant woman I dealt with in person if she could fax this info to the MTO office. "No". When I ask why, she replies that she simply cannot b/c there was no "court error in the matter" - I explain to her that if she simply faxes one tiny document, I could forego waiting an extra 5 days of driving time and that the matter would get resolved within 30 minutes.

What grinds my gears the most here, is that this bitch knew there was a holding period b/w paying up outstanding fines and reinstating one's D.L. - and she didn't tell me about it, in fact, when I asked her point-blank "so, now that I've paid I'm all up to date and there's no more problems, I can go get my licence back?" - she answered in the affirmative. Only, now that I've got her on the phone she's swimming down the largest river in Egypt - DENIAL (sp. error included for artistic measure).

I even went so far as to ask her if I lying, and so when I asked her "you calling me a liar"? she answered "yes, I am".

Then she hung up. This bitch, grrrrrrrrrrr, is gonna get hers. Somebody-gonna-get a bad bad X-Mas stocking stuffer - namely my foot up her ass!!!

I hate these ball-busting, anal-retentive, union-protected social misfits they got working for the government. It takes a certain type of asshole to work for the government - all the sour puss motherfuckers who never amounted to shit all since Day 1 of their meaningless existance.

These were the kids always being picked last for sports, played the Tuba in Band, sat alone at the lunch counter, got hit on by the ugly brace-faced-pimple-faced losers IF THEY WERE LUCKY! in high school. I hate bureaucracy. This frigid c**t is lucky that the main form of human contact for her is by people yelling at her through her plexi-glass throne. One day, some crazed moron is gonna wait for this bitch in the parking lot (and I am in now way promoting such vile and dispicable acts) - I'm just saying, that these bureau-bitches and assholes alike have got to start understanding that when you are dealing with the public, with the taxpayers who help pay their riddiculously higher than average wages, they better learn how and when to speak!

Arrrghhh.

Done (for now but not really)

EM

It's the end of Pop Culture as we know it...

Seems like any idiot today can get on tv or in the movies. So I ask myself, "hey, why aren't you rich and famous and on tv?" - and no sooner than I finish asking myself that very question, I immediately realize the answer, and it's so painfully obvious... I'M NOT AN IDIOT!

See, only brain-dead fools like Jessica Simpson or Ashton Kuchar or better yet - Donald Trump or that fat guy from Survivor (pick one)!

Further to Marty's post on his site - with respect to idiotic television shows, movies - you're right! You just want to gouge your eyes out with dull insruments laced poisonous toxins.

But then I ask you my readers - what alternatives do we have? If not for film or television, then what? Books? Art? Dare I suggest Blogs?

Future looks bleak indeed! Sheesh!

Done.

EM

Ra-spec!

Da Ali G Show...wow! Finally, some hilarious comedy back on the Canadian airways - this guy - Sacha Baron Cohen - a.k.a. Ali G (amongst other personalities) really takes it to the people - and the best thing is that he's often doing so with such extreme subtlety, its amazing to see just how easy it is to fool people.

He manages to get into some funny situations - as I just witnessed this evening - in a scene where he's hosting a political panel of 4 American politicians - he brings up voting age restrictions and suggests that America change their requirement from being at least 18 years of age to one of the following slogans below:

"If there's fluff on the muff, she's old enough"
or
"If there's grass on the pitch, do the bitch"

Let's vote on it, America! (..um, and you too Canada)

Long reign Ali G!

Done.

EM

The Wheels on the Bandwagon...

Ladies and Gentlemen, Children of all ages, Habs, Bruins, Rangers, Blackhawks, Red Wings Fans, come forth and listen to these hallowed words:

Nineteen-Sixty-Seven, 1967! For nearly 5 decades now, there is a lost ship at sea, rudderless, oft-times Captain-less, powerless to the thunderous waves of expansion, free agency, strikes, lockouts, shut-downs, shut-ins, Steve Shutts, salary caps, salary ceilings, deep pockets, endless pockets, tight-asses, dumb-asses, ticket-scalpers (both on the street and in the front-offices), ownership changes, deaths and bumblings-on-whole. The Blue, the White, the championship in sight, the playoffs that could, would and should. The planned parades, merely farce and charade, as our iron-willed club, shines their nine-iron clubs, and puts us fans to shame.

Alas, as I mortgage my house to sit in their hangar, I've found that I've mortgaged my soul. I've vowed to the end, to remain the best of friends, with a team whose not up to snuff. At times when they could, they bought the right stuff, but now those days have gone. I say they owe me, instead we've got Domi, at 2.5 mil, he's had his fill so its time that he hang 'em up. So while he's out packin' grab Belak and Aki, take Tucker, take Kilger, shave Wilm n' Alli(son), bye-bye to Eric, to Telli n' Quinn and please oh please don't come back til' you win!

Now, be not afraid, for I haven't sold out - I'm still Blue n' White (on many levels at that), but just not tonite - 'cause I'm sick and I'm tired and its true, that for all that I've said, for the blue that I've bled, I will not, like a fool, give up on these tools, though at times I have asked myself why? For its my belief that the Toronto Maple Leafs will one day arise from the ash, to kick some ass, tear the league up! So, crack open the dom, a toast to Don n' let's sip from Lord Stanley's Cup!

Dear Maple Leaf Management:

FOR FUCK'S SAKE! ENOUGH WITH THE PROFITEERING, WE GET THE POINT. WIN, DAMMIT, WIN! YOU'VE THE MONEY AND THE POWER, NOW'S THE HOUR, CARPE DIEM AND SOON, SO WE CAN SEE 'EM...WIN THE BELOVED CUP!

Thank you.


To my readers - thanks for humouring me on this one...GO LEAFS GO!


Done.

EM.

For Your Listening Pleasure

While I'm not one to make grandios claims, or to overexaggerate to any degree for that matter - I've got to say that I've discovered a magical musical talent that will rival many an artist for years and years to come.

His name is Teddy Geiger - some of you (all 5 of you actually) who've seen the new TV show - Love Monkey - with that guy from tv's "Ed" and the CIBC commercials - anyhoo, he plays this renegade music promoter who discovers this new talent - played by Geiger.

Anyhoo, for those of you curious to this guy's style (and look) he's definitely going to be thrust into the Dave Matthews/Matthew Good/Goo-Goo Dolls/John Mayer style of music - very kitschy and just chillin' music.

Personally, I enjoy what appears to be his upcoming single - "For You I Will - Confidence" - a strong song. As for looks, he's got that David Usher look (formerly or possibly still a member of Moist).

Anyways, thanks for reading and check out the music - and if you like it, remember, I told you first!

Done.

EM

Random Website Of The Month

Good News!

The Random Website of the Month has been updated! Better late than never!

Enjoy.

Done.

EM


P.S. Levs...I saw your muse tonight, gave her your number so she should call you, but...um, she was fat dude, like orca fat. Good luck with that though!

Peace.

What Grinds My Gears (TM)

Firstly, thanks to Peter Griffin for the inspiring use of a famous line he uttered...please don't sue me!

More importantly: I've got to unload here a slight (if there's such a thing from me) rant...

Crosswalking. Crosswalkers. Webster's Dictionary ought to define crosswalking as "the inability to walk in a single given direction, within a straight line, subsequently causing those who are indeed capable of walking a straight line, behind you, to be prematurely cut-off and in oft cases, a scuffing of footwear or an outright stumble occurs". A Crosswalker is then, by default, and individual so annoying as to commit the aforementioned action.

I hate these people. Someone did that to me today - it really "grinds my gears". Why, lord, why, can't these people just walk straight - I could understand if they were so preoccupied with reading a book/magazine etc. or realizing that they've missed their desired turning point or destination - so they cut you off, but...to randomly be walking a seemingly straight pattern/direction and to just veer off into your way...for fuck's sake!!

Now, I know one might attempt to rationalize this a simple loss of balance or equilibrium - but nay I say. It is not. For the fact remains that these people are still walking in a forwardly fashion, with nary a stumble or misstep at all.

I think there should be a new rule - slap 'em upside the head, or better yet, trip them. If these idiots can't even walk straight, do we really want them around society's other dangers - driving motor vehicles? conducting trains? flying airplanes? doing our taxes? teaching our children how to earn their "Turtle" badges? I mean, this can't be allowed to happen!

Now maybe I'm a little over-sensitive here, but I seriously can't stand when people do that. Let's get our shit together here, people! Walk the line (thanks Johnny) or watch out!

Done.

EM

In lieu of a proper title

A new edition to the blog:

Letters I'd wish I'd written - on occasion I will post anonymous letters that I wish I'd have written, or had the courage to write. While they won't necessarily all make sense as to whom they're from (in fact they're anonymous), I'm hopefull that you'll enjoy their content and hopefully their context. Your feedback on this edition is appreciated.

LETTER # 1:

24th of May, 1947

Dear Maggie,

Your visit this afternoon was greatly appreciated. The rhubarb pie was phenomenal as always. I must say that I was saddened to hear about your boy, Herman. Such a pity, really - those two were always getting into it, weren't they? I just know that my Winston would never stand for such a thing - to think that they were going to be business partners!

I must confess to you that one night, back in March, I caught the two of them fondling the cow so to speak, and I just about lost my senses. Heaven knows that, had they tried that with me, I'd have shown them the door.

You know I'm not one to gossip, but the rumour about town is that you must be in tears after what Herman did. To think he had the nerve to just go out like that and embarass himself to that degree, I'll never understand!

In any case my dear, next time you come over, you have simply got to bring me some of that delicious raspberry tart you make!

Best Wishes!

(name withheld for legal purposes)

-Kansas City, Kansas

A tiskit, a tasket - what the fuck's in your basket?

Consider this the blog to end all blogs! No musings of muses, no mention of men. The fight I fight is for fighting's right to be the best I am. A rhythm of rhyme with no rhyme or reason, an act of love or an act of treason, no matter which way you slice my bread, I too shall act until I am dead.

There's much to make of a maker's make, to meet your maker though, a grand mistake, for to take one's life one must reveal the secret of Caramilk and all that's concealed, that last little line had no point at all, but to point out one's faults is inconsiderate.

When I said I'm gonna ramble and rave, t'was no illusion that I gave that I'm gonna say what's on my mind and if you don't mind I'll act in kind, and allow you a chance to post your views, so long as you don't mention that stupid muse!

Just thought I'd do something different.

Done.

EM

Hey, McFly!

2:55am - Back To The Future (Part I) is on TBS - and even though I own the Trilogy on box-set DVD, its an irresistable urge to watch - y'know, that good 'ol Marty McFly, the DeLorean, Doc Brown...Hill Valley, it's all good... "roads, where we're goin' we don't NEED, roads..." beautiful stuff... and then I ask myself, "hey, why's he not swearing where there's swearing?" which brings me to the issue at hand... t.v. censorship.

Now, maybe I've blogged about this before - those of you who are keeping track let me know, those of you who aren't - what good are you?!

But here's what I've noticed thus far in my 26.5 years on this planet - channels on tv, such as TBS or CITY-TV - they air good, indeed, great movies (CITY-TV even goes so far to call one their segments - "Great Movies on CITY-TV" - so, y'know, they've gotta be great) yet there are many a time on either channel where a random censory edit has been performed - and all I'm saying is WHY??

Why bother airing something if it doesn't meet the broadcast decency standards or whatever...I mean either change the rules or don't bother showing that stuff on TV, 'cause quite frankly, no matter how many times you try, no one is ever going to enjoy or get used to John Maclean saying "yippee kiyay mother hugger" it's MUTHERFUCKER...... say FUCK. don't say hug, slug, loser, josher etc...say the word its meant to be or don't say it at all...and I can't even figure out what's worse - editing the words or just mildly bleeping over them, or even better is when you know he's saying fuck and they're trying to convice you he's said and always said "fudge" - puhleese...

But maybe it's just me!

Mutherfudger!

Done.

EM

Spring Break

'Tis the season to be half-naked on the beaches of Daytona, Miami or Acapulco!!

And yet, I find myself here in the hauntingly hallowed houses of Thornhill in March - yay for me. Now, I wouldn't say I'm the jealous type, more like the "ooh, I wish I could have/do/buy that" type...and though I am so fortunate to be surrounded by my family, friends and all-around loved ones, what I wouldn't give to be strolling down the beaches of some sand-dune oasis in the Carribbean!

They say Spring is such a lovely time of year - the birds are singing, flowers are starting to bloom, the snow and ice is melting, Love is in the air - and something else too... what's that I smell? Why, I think it's, yes....it's shit!

Spring smells like shit. Seriously now, think about it - go outside, step past the threshholds of your homes, fill your lungs with that sweet, sweet air and stop to realize - it's shit!

Dogs crapping all over the place, the musky smell of dead flora beneath the melting snow and ice - an all around great sensation!

Give me the beaches of Miami any day!

Done.

EM

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D'oh!

Um, I forgot to mention... there's a link to donate money on the last blog - its at the end of the lil' reminder I did...so just go back on the last link (entitled "With A Little Help From My Friends") and um, ya do it!

sweet. thanks.

Done.

EM

A Little Help From My Friends

Hey All,

Sorry I haven't been online in a bit - just haven't - no other excuse really. OK so a quick favour to ask of you my friends and readers alike...

Jodi's raising some money for the MS Society to help find a cure for Multiple Sclerosis - specifically she's looking for donations - any amount is beneficial - $1.00 - $1,000,000.00 - whatever you wanna part ways with (plus for those of you who are so concerned, its tax deductible and the MS Society gives you a receipt!!)

Anyways, she's looking to raise $500 - now I say y'all help her out and try n' double it... $1000!!!! So far I've done my share, and well, hopefully you guys can help do yours too!

And, if you don't feel like or are unable to contribute financially then perhaps you can spread the word and let all your friends and loved ones know about this mission!

Many thanks.

Senor Jetboy.

Done.
EM

https://msors.mssociety.ca/WALK2006/Sponsor.aspx?L=2&PID=808911

The Rain In Spain...

Move over Eliza Dolittle, seems the Mishugana Michiganites have usurped your slaughter of the English language...in fact good 'ol Uncle Sam's been teaching his kiddies a few things o'er the past 230 years - but apparently English ain't one o' dem...did you know that in America, its not a "box" but rather a "baaaax" and that one doesn't eat an "apple" but rather an "aaaayaaple" - and so while they all think that us Canucks are "ooot n' abooot on the roooooooof" - I was merely cringing as every red-blooded American greeted me this weekend with their nasal-infested lambasting of the English language.

On a more interesting side note - this weekend, I covered a lot of ground - had a fun and crazy (though mildly inebriating) weekend. Friday night was fun one - a good birthday bash for Ms. Jodi - mazel tov again on that one babe - Saturday very early in the morning, begot the drive to the USA!USA!USA!... and lemme tell ya, the Toyota Camry - wicked mileage - one tank o' regular 87 octane - 760.5km - and there was probably another 40 or 50kms left in 'er real easy...but who wants to find out on the 401 out near Bumblefudge, ON??

Now, I gotta say, and in fact I was saying this earlier to some of my family - the ladies in Michigan....WOW... now, I'm happily in love n' like n' all that jazz (really I am, honest babe, don't be mad...) I'm just saying that for a couple of you, my mates, my brothers-in-arms-and-blogs-alike, you guys woulda been foaming at the mouth, drooling like the dogs some of you can be...and I wish I could corroborate this evidence, however like a tool (and what makes it worse is that it isn't the first time - see: Ellie and the Argonauts) I FORGOT THE DAMN MEMORY CARD TO THE CAMERA... oh ya, and the wedding was nice n' all...but man did they overpay and get so little in return...oh and while I'm on this...can someone please confirm or deny - $15,000 for a wedding band????? Are you kidding???!!!!! For another couple a bucks, you can get the Rolling Stones for an hour!!

OK so um let's see this is a long one: NYC - allow me to sum up with just a few words if you will...details to follow potentially - SNOW, MORE SNOW, STRAWBERRY FIELDS, LEAFS v. RANGERS, BILLY JOEL, SPLINTERS OF WOOD, TRUMP DUMP, INXS - THE NEW VERSION, ALCOHOLISM, WALKING, MORE WALKING, GOD MY FEET ARE KILLING ME FROM ALL THE WALKING, KNOCK-OFF HANDBAGS, SKETCHY ALLEYWAY SHOPPING, ROLEX-SHMOLEX, DID I MENTION SNOW? PULL-OUT SOFA, CRAZY CAT, ALLERGIC REACTION, LACTARD, FINESSE MITCHELL, MILLION-DOLLAR-MANSION, $700 PER MONTH FOR THIS?!?!?, PROP. PLANES, DELAY OF GAME, CRAP PLANES, BUFFALO, WHITE-OUT DRIVING CONDITIONS...JODI & I HAD A GREAT TIME!

Done. Peace.

Ciao for now!

EM

L'Chaim

A Toast and a brief blog...

To Jodi, Happy Birthday n' Mazel Tov on your 25th!

I wish you all the best, may all your dreams come true, or at least as many as you can fit into one year!

Love,

Ellie

...and now for something completely different...

Going to Motown on Saturday - got my cousin's wedding, his first and hopefully his last (if you knew his sister, you'd understand)!

I'll be sure to stop at the Mongolian Grill either in London or Waterloo (most likely London b/c I remember the directions off by heart, though the 'loo is so tiny I could find it no problem)! Mmmmmm....Mongolian....all you can eat make it yerself cook it with giant chopsticks yumminess....sweet!

Ciao for now.

Done.

EM

P.S. It's safe to go to Cancun...just don't be Italian-Canadian, having a wedding and/or pissed off a couple of women with knives...that's f**ked up shizzle...I hope they find those bastards n' beat the life out of them, let them recover and beat them summore!

Done for sure.

EM

A Splendid Time Is Guaranteed For All

OK kids (n' adults too I suppose),

Friday the 24th of February in the lord's year of 2006 (whose lord is up for grabs at this point...) there's a gonna be a bash, a par-tay, a shin-dig, a hull-a-ba-loo, a gay-'ol-time, etceterra, etceterra, etceterra at the Andy Pool Hall on College (at Bathurst if memory serves correctly, or if dare serve at all) and its my girl's bday party... that's right kids, Jodi's turnin' 24 all over again...seems she didn't get it just quite right last time, so she wants a do-over, a mulligan for you golfers out there...and I say, LET'S GIVE IT TO HER!

Let's hear it for the girl!! She's so sweet, so kind, so out of my mind (huh, it rhymes, ok??) 'and well I'm probably gonna eat shit for this one b/c now I'm makin' it an open-party, but y'know if I know you and if I like you and if I've openly seen you in public (and possibly your loved or really liked or damn sexy one too) - then make yourself beknownst unto me and the beautiful Jodi this Friday night - say 'round 930, 10ish?

Fashionably Tastefull, Elegantly Wastefull, Decoratively Artfull and above all, Sinfully Playfull (its amazing the kind of prose one creates at 330am!!!) are optimistically welcome to the aforementioned affair.

No need to bring gifts, but rumour has it the birthday girl won't shy away from a free drink - but, cash is always good too :O)

For all you bums that haven't responded to the evite that was sent to you - dammit, do it! She's been checking the thing non-stop and I mean c'mon kids, just say yay or nay n' let her move on with her day (which translates into allowing me to enjoy quality time with my girl w/o her having the need to run to the computer n' check on the evite situation... hi honey! love ya! muah!)

OK so now that I'm definitely in deep doo-doo, you GOTTA come out - at least to save my butt - or to watch it get kicked repeatedly, and probably with some kind of heel or pointed toe to boot!

Much love for you all...except for those of you whom we've simply agreed to just be friends and just be supportive to one another you know who you are... and um, since you know who you are, would you mind sharing that tidbit of information with me too? Thanks!

Anyhoo, thats about all I got for now...check out the link in the title of this blog to get directions and see the uber-swank and ultra-hip website for the joint in question (www.andypoolhall.com) for those of you too lazy to scroll back up.

Ciao for now!

Done.

EM.

P.S. JoJo - don't kill me :)

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN...AHEM...

A new feature, man I've got serious time on my hands eh?

Anyhoo, new feature on the blog - Random Web Site of the Month. Each month, there will be a posting for the new random site of the month. It may be accessible via the links section on the left..err, the other left!!!! - titled, cleverly enough, RANDOM WEBSITE OF THE MONTH (I don't like to overcomplicate things, well sometimes, but this clearly, is not one of those times).

For your ease and/or enjoyment, I have taken the liberty of hyper-linking this heading to said Randome Site of the Month...

Cheers, Enjoy, L'Chaim! MAZEL TOV!

Done.

EM

NEW & IMPROVED BLOG (?)

Hey fans (I'm assuming I have fans, it'd be nice to have fans or to at least make some fans. Note: MARCH is Fan Appreciation Month), I was a tad bored and couldn't sleep - surprise surprise, and well so I changed the appearance of the blog.

I fixed the anonnymonyomous commenting sitch, only it reversed my links on the side - I'l lfix that shortly, but hey, first things first...check out my new colour scheme!!!

Ciao for now FANS!

Done.

EM

Untitled

OK so um I feel the need to blog, and I know I owe an updated account of my trip to NYC but quite honestly, I'm just not ready yet for it. That was a big 4 days, and so it's gonna take time to get things right....your patience is greatly appreciated.

So what's new and exciting in cyber-space? How about reality? Well, let's see, shall we...went to the Auto Show today and it was probably the fastest I've ever zipped through the thing. I guess it just wasn't really in me...I mean I was excited to go but then when we got there, I dunno it was just like, ok, let's wheel n' deal but without the deal...so let's wheel!

Interesting vehicles of note (to me anyways) the Toyota FJ (a throwback styling attempt to the Rovers of the 60's) but looks like a fun drive. Lexus IS250/350 were true beauties...and then there was the RDX, by Acura - though it wasn't the production model slated for next year, it sure was perdy! It's going to be some competition for BMW's X3..mmmmm yummy!


OK, 'nuff for now...up next BODYWORLDS from the Science Centre - that is if we can get past the parking lot - seems like this is one hot exhibit - 3rd time's a charm???

For those of you wishing to comment annonymously...as soon as I figure out how to reverse my curse, you're in baby!

Done.

EM

Don't Do Crack

Nothing big to say just yet - gathering my notes from NYC - lots to talk about, including possibly the Finesse Mitchel of SNL story, the Billy Joel -Chainsaw Edition-Show, Leafs/Rangers and um maybe a tale of the Trump Dump an INXS too!

Marty beautiful bloggin'...something to keep me on my toes well appreciated...and don't worry kids...photos to appear oh-so-very soon!

Snow in Central Park

Quick hello to everyone - NYC is amazing, Leafs - not so much!

Billy Joel concert was full of energy and really fun and cheese...but fun!

Its snowing here - a lot! And its beautiful...we're gonna go walk in it for a while, check out a museum or something - y'know something cultural!

Ciao for now kids... GO TEAM CANADA!!

Done.

EM

ok so um where's everyone?

Off to NYC this weekend for a little NHL, Billy Joel, R n' R, some Carnegie Deli perhaps??

I'm gonna visit the city that never sleeps, and much like myself lately at that!

Look for some good bloggin' upon my return, in the meanwhile, you'll have to settle for urination condemnation from Sir Martin!

Not to worry though mate, I'll bring you back a nice colostomy bag from Prada - NYC!

Peace for now.

Done.

EM

SWEEP!!!

Update...Grammy's are now over and whaddya know... U2 are the clear winners - sweeping all their categories with 5 parlophone trophys!!

Mazel Tov Boys.

Gotta say interesting moment of the night - Jay-Z/Linkin Park joined onstage by Sir Paul McCartney - yikes! Wow! Weird!

Kanye did good, U2 did better. Booyah!

Well done lads, well done.

Song of the Day: Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own.
Hell, Song of the Year: City of Blinding Lights.
Album of the Year: How To Dismantle An Atomic Bomb.

Well worth the tour boys...thanks!
Done.

EM

Unos, Dos, Tres, Quatorce!!

So a lil' par-tay known in the biz as the Grammy's...and um ya what can I say but as of press time - 3 trophys to the Irish Quartet - HELLO! HELLO!

SuperBowl XL

Super Bowl XL came and went and so too did the barrage of commercialism that is attached with it. So, I watched this event but not so much for the game itself (b/c who cares, I'm a CANADIAN AND I LIKE HOCKEY!) however, for the lavish entertainment spectacle (c'mon wardrobe malfunction!!!!!).

The Stones, Rolling Stones did the half time show - and might I say their stage was a true marvel - beautiful concept of encompassing a select number of fans with a wrap-around catwalk, all in the shape of their logo (the famed open mouth, complete with tongue sticking out) - I think another band used that technique, can't think of their names right now but I'm sure it'll come to me or U2 - let me know if U2 can (or cannot) think of their name.

Aretha Franklin and Aaron Neville sang the Star Spangled Banner - and may I just say right here, right now that if you watched SNL this past Saturday - Horatio Sanz' impression of 'ol molehead was superbowl bang on!!! Hilarious - JoJo n' I couldn't stop laughing when we saw the real deal...mahvelous!

And then, last but not least, one of the last few blind marvels of music, Sir Stevie Wonder went through a lovely medley of all his greatest hits (some of the stuff I admit, I didn't even know were his). Gotta say though it was a tad weak - blind guy, tremendously talented, joined onstage by some of the weakest performers ever - and I mean, who the hell were some of those "artists" anyways? Ten bucks says that they had to buy a ticket (at scalped prices - $5000 ea. anyone???) just to get in!!

Oh well...Steelers won, whoopididoo!! At least someone in Pittsburgh is winning these days (ya I'm talkin' to you Sidney).

As for ticket prices and commercial airing rates - holy crap do Americans have money to burn and brain cells to go with 'em! Who the fudge would seriously pay $2,500,000 for 30 seconds to advertise the new and improved Viagra - now with 100% real prune juice, not from concentrate?????

Moreover, the commercials, as funny as I hope they'll be - we don't even get to watch in CANADA - thanks a lot CRTC you @#$%@#$%@$%!!#$%!!!@@#$@!!!!! (y'know they won't let me actually say what I want to say - yay to Canada's version of the FCC - FREE HOWARD STERN!)

Fuck it...I'm out!

Done.

EM

I've Scene It All...

Without question, a gauntlet, a dirty, stinky, smelly, tiny glove of gobbeldeygook has landed at my feet. It appears that the fool in question, Sir Levy of the fifedom of the Mighty Reds, has fallen on his cute, yet balding head!

I guess once you get to your age 'ol chap, the mind is the first thing that starts to go. If memory serves correctly, and I know that my memory lays oh so preciously and precariously intact, I whooped yo' ass in the Scene It challenge at Casa Del Spivak!

Glory be unto the King, for I have a reign of useless movie knowledge that will continue to rain down upon thee!

Despite any claims that you may have won the actual game, we all know that Lady Luck (that conniving bitch) simply rolled those loaded dice against me (and my lovely partner Jo Jo!).

I hereby do formally decree as Lord of the Scenes, that from this day forth Mr. Levy be banned to the outskirts of cinematic fury, and may he forever be doomed to watch repeats of Bette Middler movies until his dying days!

Now, you can choose to attempt to save your little cinematic arse, by accepting that I am indeed your MOVIE MASTER!

Peace Out Biatch!

Done.

EM